Benny's Story

First of all, growing up gay isn't easy no matter where you live, but when you live in a small town like I do, it's just that much harder.

In bigger cities, it's a lot easier for us to find information and support. Smaller towns tend to be less supportive, less accepting, and more conservative. Growing up in a small town was pretty rough for me. After coming to terms with myself and I could say it to myself that I am gay, I wanted to find others like me. I wanted to find other people that I could feel comfortable talking to, but where would I ever find them?? There were a few brave souls that were openly gay. Everyone in town knew they were gay, but what would everyone say if they knew I was friends with them or talked to them? They would know for sure I was gay , and I was SO not ready for that! I had to keep it under wraps. I was pretty well known in High School and throughout our small community. I would have just died if other people had found out!!!

I had no clue where to go, no where to turn, no one to talk to. I did eventually find one way though. Thank the heavens above I was born in the digital age. The Internet became my outlet to the rest of the world. I could talk to others like me, speak freely about everything and nothing. I found support, and answers to questions I'd been carrying around a long time. I made some very good friends online that really helped me through those first months and later on through the coming out process.

What a wonderful thing the Internet is for people in my same situation. You can be totally anonymous about who you are and still get results, answers and support. If you're reading this right now, you're at a very good starting point. Youth Resource is a GREAT place for youth to find support and information. You can find people to answer questions, clubs to join lots of info on things that are important to you.

So, living in a small town doesn't necessarily have to be as confining as it seems. Things might seem bad now, but things do get better with time. With the help of the Internet, I'm completely out now in my community. My friends thousands of miles away -- most I've never met helped me find the courage to be who I am and live a happy healthy life.

One final piece of advice... Don't worry, you're not the only one going through whatever you're going through, and there are people in the world who care and are willing to help. You just gotta find us! Take care and chin up!